That old sound

I think everyone has songs that remind them of sometime in their life.  Sometimes it's an entire genre of songs and bands.  Just about anything classic rock takes me back my childhood.  Not necessarily all good memories that come back but it still makes me a wee bit nostalgic.  Even if they weren't normally great times, it was still my childhood.  A lot of them bring back parties that my parents threw, 6 hour drives to visit relatives or just my dad sitting around listening to the radio.  And there are other things that it brings to mind but I don't want to dwell on the past all the time.  I'm trying to remember good times more and less bad times.  For some reason, no matter what memory a song invokes, I still miss that time in my life.  I guess you'll always long for your childhood back.  And as a child, you can't wait to get it over with.  My mom would always tell me as a kid that I shouldn't try and grow up too fast, enjoy being a kid and playing.  At the time I just assumed she was saying that because when you got older, you had bills to pay.  Now I realize there's this innocence when you're  a child that you can never get back.  Once it's gone, it's gone for good.  I wouldn't give up what I have now for anything but that doesn't mean that I don't occasionally want to go back to a time when things were simpler.

Tags: childhood, classic rock, nostalgia

What my birthday means to me

Today was my birthday.  (the 27th)  It started out great and ended badly.  We'll start at the end.  Jasmine climbed onto the dishwasher and grabbed a small glass ornament and chewed it up.  I'm not sure if she swallowed any or not.  I called my doctor who never called back (it was 3am) so I called the hospital and the nurse was not too helpful.  She basically said keep an eye on her.  I was scared half to death though.  Now I see why parents always say they've earned their gray hairs.  Now to the beginning, my mom, grandma, brother and his girlfriend all came over and then we went to dinner.  My brother's girlfriend literally made me laugh until I cried.  Then me, Shawn, Jasmine, my brother and his g/f went to the mall and I bought her a pair of jeans.  We had a pretty good time.  And found out that my husband and my brother's girlfriend have known eachother since she was real young.  Small world. 

Being as it was my birthday I was thinking about my mom a lot and the fact that 24 years ago she was in labor.  She was alone (my grandmother waited in the waiting room) and probably scared.  I know I would've been, hell I was even though I had both Shawn and my mom in the delivery room with me.  I was thinking about how much I put her through in my teens and how if I knew then what I know now, I would've acted very differently.  I wouldn't have went out when I shouldn't.  I wouldn't have come home five minutes late.  I wouldn't have dissappointed her.  I would've tried harder.  I would've showed her I loved her more often than I did.  I wouldn't have given her so many dirty looks.  I would've spent more time enjoying her company, instead of worrying about the next time I would see my friends.  There's countless things I would've done differently.  I would've appreciated her more.  And I would've showed that appreciation more.  I've been taking more time to reflect on things that I had previously.  Before a birthday was just a birthday.  Now I think more about my mother.  I think about how we should've been celebrating her instead of me.  She's the one who made it through all that stuff.  The selfish years of my adolescents, the hormonal tween years and the years where I was coming into adulthood.  I regret every time I made her cry.  Every time I made her doubt herself as a mother.  Every time I made her so frustrated that she didn't know what to do or where to turn.  The times she worried.  The times I confused her.  I do not regret every single second of memories I have with her.  Every moment that she is with me, I cherish.  She's not just my mom, she's also my best friend, my confidant and occasionally, my partner in crime.  I would not be the person I am if not for my mother.  She's the reason for every good piece of character that I have.  I love you mom. 

Tags: my birthday, mom, jasmine, eating glass

Dog pics

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Pics from today

You can't tell I got a digital camera for xmas can you?  haha

Xmas Pics

INFJ

I took one of those hokey online personality tests tonight.  I was shocked.  It had be pegged exactly in so many different ways.  I am an INFJ.  INFJ Profile  If you would like to know what your personality traits are a little more in depth... Online test based on Jung - Myers-Briggs typology  Who knows, maybe you could learn about yourself.  Or even better, let me know what you are so I can learn more about you.