Losing it

Last night, after getting out of the shower, I went to clean my ears and suddenly couldn't hear well out of the left one.  Since then it has gotten steadily worse.  If I wake up in the morning with no hearing, I will be calling the doctor.  Actually, if I have ANY symptoms at all, I will be calling the doctor.  I wasn't concerned initially but then I started doing a web search and found that it could be very serious and I may never fully recover my hearing.  After reading that, I broke down crying.  I have always valued my eye sight (what I have) and my hearing.  I could never choose whether I would rather be death or blind.  You want to be able to watch your children grow up but you also want to be able to hear their voice.  I wish I had just went to medpoint to begin with but I didn't want to seem like a hypercondriac.  How stupid will I feel if this is something that could have been helped if I had just went to a doctor immediately?  Something I think is good, is that it was getting better for a while if I pulled on my earlobe.  It seemed to be a wax thing so I had Shawn go to CVS and buy me some ear drops.  After using them, I feel worse.  The ringing in my ears is deafening in and of itself.  This is going to be a really long night.  I just want to wake up and have this all be over with.