One is born and another leaves

On a day where one family can be so utterly happy, another can just as easily be totally destroyed.  That was the case on the 26th of December.  Don and Channon had a perfect baby boy. (named Trent) My neighbor just a few doors down, shot himself in the head and killed himself just after midnight.  He and his wife had recently seperated and his 19 year old daughter had moved out of the house not long before.  He left a note apologizing but that won't help his family much during this time.  Even worse, he is my next door neighbors stepbrother.  The same neighbor whose son killed himself almost eight years ago.  It's terrible that his daughter will have that tragedy to remember every year on Christmas.  It may have been the day after but the exact day will never matter to his family.  How do you ever celebrate Christmas and family again with that hanging over your head.  It's hard to believe I'll never see him driving down the road dragging some junk car behind him for scrap parts, never have him stop by the house to ask if we needed any help hauling something away.  I can only hope that his daughter finds some way to overcome what suicide does to a person.  I once heard that a person who kills themselves dies one death but the family left behind dies a thousand deaths.  Anyone a product of suicide knows exactly how true that is.  Every time a friend or family member seems abnormally distressed or upset about something you will automatically fear that suicide is on that persons mind.  I don't know if I'll ever feel normally about human emotions ever again.  How can you after being a part of something so terrible.  At least with murder you can hate someone, blame someone, punish someone.  How do you punish, hate and blame someone who was so depressed they felt the only way out was to die?  Especially when you loved that someone, when that someone is family. 

To make matters worse, a 16 year old girl was the person to find him dead.  He used a large caliber gun to kill himself with and the girl immediately started screaming.  Her father found her.  They had went to the house because his wife had sensed something was wrong when she couldn't get into the house and called on the neighbor to help.  Not only did they lose a friend but they will never get that imagine out of their minds.  You can never get over something like that.