Another long night

It's been a rough night so far.  I'm getting a small break while she sits in her bouncer.  She's been colicky for almost 5 hours.  It's the longest episode so far.  I'm hoping it's a sign that it can only get better?  Even the dogs are starting to give her dirty looks and frustrated sighs.  I've been relatively calm.  I realize that she's in pain and this is the only way she can express it.  You can't help but want to at least pull your own hair out occasionally though. 

I got my fairy tattoo on Friday.  I wasn't expecting on going for another two weeks or so but Shawn called and told me to get ready.  It definitely doesn't tickle getting stuck with a needle over and over again.  It looks really great though.  And he even improved upon my original picture.  I'll have photos of it online as soon as I get them developed.  I'm going back in two weeks to get another one.  I'm getting Jasmine's name in the middle of a hibiscus flower.  I'm having the guy design it for me since he did such a good job with the last one.  He was really nice and made me feel very comfortable.  It doesn't hurt that he's worked with a few really well known guys who tattoo.  One of which was considered number one in the world two years in a row.  Their website is under a bit of construction right now but you can have a look around if you'd like.  It's www.pointblanktat2.com To see tattoo's that the guy's have done you have to click on the artist link... Half Pint is the guy that did my tattoo.  (yes that's his real name, he's native american)  I really couldn't have been happier with my tattoo.  I've been reccomending him to everyone who asks about it.  When my brother goes to get his tattoo, he's going to Half Pint.  I don't think he would've if he hadn't seen how great mine looks because the prices can get a little steep but you get what you pay for.  Well, I'd better get back to it.  She's got a doctor's appointment on Wednesday where she'll be given some shots so I won't get any rest before our cookout on Saturday.  Unless by some miracle they make her sleepy and not fussy.

A small victory

Shhhhhhh.  I FINALLY got Jasmine to fall asleep on her own in her bassinet!  I have to make sure the pacifier stays in her mouth but it's worth it.  She has yet to fall asleep in her crib and when I put her in it already asleep, she rarely stays that way.  The longest she's slept in it is 3 hours.  I know I shouldn't but I'm tiptoeing through the house.  Had she fallen sleep with her dad or in her swing I would carry on as normal but for her to sleep in the bassinet is a miracle in itself.  I know within an hour she'll be awake again though.  We have to make very tiny steps forward with her sleeping habits.  Everynight she still sleeps with either myself or Shawn.  Part of me will welcome the day when she sleeps in her crib on her own and the other part of me wants to prolong it for my own selfish reasons.  I like waking up BEFORE she's screaming for a bottle, I like being able to look over and know that she's still breathing without having to walk across the house.  I don't like sleeping in uncomfortable positions and I miss my bed.  I'm already worried about her using a pacifier.  I'm seeing a year from now the fight I'll have to go through to get it away from her and the tantrums I'm sure she'll throw night after night. 

Shawn got her name tattooed on his arm under where my name is on Saturday.  I thought it would be interesting to watch it get done but it was just really boring.  I'm glad I'll have more people with me when I get mine done because I'll have someone to talk to since mine will take so much longer than Shawn's did. 

We've got some sick cats right now.  One has an upper respiratory infection and I'm not sure what's wrong with the other cat.  (Libby has the infection and Mink I'm not sure about) Mink has been losing weight over the past few weeks which I think is because she wasn't able to get to the cat food anymore.  She's covered in fleas and it doesn't seem to matter what I do to get rid of them.  I've done the same things to her that I did for the other cats and her fleas remain while the others haven't.  She's also laying down when she has to pee and then she cries while she's doing it like it's painful.  I'm worried that it's the beginningof kidney failure.  Both cats are on antibiotics and I'm hoping that both problems clear up with that and canned food. 

My mom came home today and told me that one of her friends is pregnant again.  This will be her third pregnancy.  The first two ended with miscarriage.  I really hope this one makes it.  I don't know if she can take another miscarriage.  She's said several times that she won't try again if she miscarries again.  She gives herself several shots of heprin a day to thin her blood.  (her body overclots and when she would get pregnant, she would get blood clots in her placents, cutting off the life supply to the fetus) If she carries to term, whether she has a boy or a girl, I'll have plenty of clothes to give to her.

Well, I'd better start on dinner and tiptoe into the other room to see if she's actually still sleeping or staring at the ceiling.

Phone's were out

I haven't been online for a while because our phone lines got all messed up from one of the storms we had.  It took them SEVERAL days to fix it.  During that time, my grandpa went back into the hospital for kidney failure.  He was there for a week or so before they felt he was well enough to be released.  They did tons of tests and we never found out why.  It seems that generation doesn't think to ask why they're giving them shots and xrays.  He says they xrayed every joint in his body, did a endoscopy and another test to check something they found in his spine.  He's home now.  I'm hoping to go over there this afternoon if Shawn gets home at a decent time. 

Jasmine gets bigger every hour it seems.  She's still staying up till all hours of the night.  I never had a problem staying up all night till I had a baby and then I'm sitting there begging her to fall asleep already. 

Me and Shawn will be having a cookout the middle of August.  It's gotten pretty expensive.  What originally was supposed to be family only has become a big to do and bonfire.  Hopefully it doesn't rain.

tattoo

Tattoo

Jasmine   That's the tattoo that I'm planning on getting next month.  Everything that's in white will be black outline and of course, the large black box won't be part of the tattoo.  And her name will be directly underneath of the fairy.  I'm getting it on the lower part of my back on the right side.  I have several tattoos that I want to eventually get but this is the most important one right now.  The next one will be Shawn's name on my arm.  (haven't decided on right or left yet) This one will be my first tattoo.  I've been wanting to get one for years but didn't want to get something that I'd regret so I spent many years looking at designs.  I know I won't regret my first one, that's for sure.

Sleeping

Shawn's back to work this week.  It'll be nice when the money starts coming back in but it sucks at night.  She still hasn't gotten on a sleep schedule so there's never any way to tell when she's actually going to sleep and for how long.  Last night was a good night.  I was asleep before 3am and she slept till 7am.  She stayed up for a little over two hours before going back to sleep till noon.  Unfortunately, she's usually up for about two hours after every feeding.  I can't believe how big she's gotten already.  I want to be able to remember every single moment of right now but I'm sure some day I'll start to forget the little things that are so important right now.  That's probably why I take so many pictures of her.  I want to remember every smile, pose and grimace. 

Pictures and Updates

I would've wrote again sooner but everytime I get online, she starts to cry.  I can do anything else and she's an angel, I get online and she screams.  =)  Shawn and I got married at the courthouse on July 8th.  We'll have a ceremony next year on the same day where all our family and friends can be there.  It was over very quickly.  We didn't even have a chance to catch our breath before we knew it, it was over. 

We've recently been experiencing the joys of colick.  Neither Shawn nor myself is getting much sleep these days.  She usually doesn't stop crying till between 4-6am.  It's very frustrating and we feel awful for her because there's nothing we can do to make her feel better.  We basically take turns failing at calming her for hours on end.  She's starting to smile a lot more now.  Every morning when she wakes up she smiles for about ten minutes.  She's in the very beginning of cooing.  One night when she was asleep, she laughed.  That was the only time she's done it but of course it almost made me start balling.  Every day I look at her and think she's getting big too fast.  I'm already worried about the first day of school.  I'm positive I'll be a mess.  I've literally taken a photo album's worth of pictures already. 

Everything hasn't been all rosy this past month.  My grandpa went into the hospital on July 3rd.  He was in severe pain in his abdomen.  It turned out to be pancreatitis.  He had some very scary nights while in the hospital.  There was one day when we rushed to the hospital thinking the worst.  He finally came home yesterday evening.  It'll be a long time before I'll be able to relax though.  I'm always waiting for that phone call that he's back in the hospital. 

Shawn broke one of his fingers and is on disability until he's cleared from the doctor.  That's been very stressful with a new baby.  The first week he drove me up the wall because he was restless and worried about money.  It's gotten better since then thankfully.  It's nice to have him home though.  Every once and a while I'm able to get a full night of sleep without waking up to the baby because he's home and allows me to sleep.  I'm very grateful for that on the nights when I'm so tired that I literally feel like my eyes are bleeding. 

We had to put our Siberian Husky to sleep right after Jasmine was born.  She hadn't been eating well for quite some time and the vets couldn't figure out what was causing it.  We took her in for an ultrasound and found that she had a great deal of cancer growing in her body.  We made the decision to have her euthanized when the vet told us we had to make the decision soon or it would be out of our hands.  We didn't want her to suffer like that.

Other than that, our lives have basically been feeding, changing, sleeping and consoling a baby.  I'm amazed at all the swings, bouncers, etc that are out there.  We recently received a bouncer that has "fish" in an aquarium and it literally blows bubbles.  She's fascinated by it.  Well, she's crying now so I must be going.  I'll try to write again soon.