Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Tick, Tick, Tick

Feeling :: Confused

Now, I'm a woman, you'd think I would be able to understand them a little better than a man would?  Right?  Apparently, the part of my brain that sorts out what females are thinking, is defected.  I'm 21 years old.  I'm young.  I should be thinking about my career, having fun and just enjoying being 21.  Right?  Then why is it that at times, I hear my biological clock ticking?  That's a noise reserved for people in their 30's and 40's... right?  I keep doing math in my head... 'ok, if I had a kid right now, it would be 10 when I was about 32... it would already be 10... Ten Year Old!!!  shouldn't I quit wasting my time and give the kid a young mother...'  And then I think things like, what if I can get pregnant now but I won't be able to in a year or two but I won't know that until I try to get pregnant and find out I can't.  Yes, we women are a strange species and we're definitely a different species from the males.  They don't worry about stupid things like that.  They just go with the flow, what happens, happens, type of thing.  Where's Dr. Phil when you need him?  LOL  There's a million ways that men and women are different and I don't think our biggest differences are strictly physical, if that was all it was, there wouldn't be a 50% divorce rate in the US.  It's weird is all.  Two people grow up in the same house hold with similar experiences, same up bringing and yet they turn out completely different, mainly because one is male and the other is female.  Ah well, I'm curious but not curious enough to go take classes on physcology and child development and behavior.  I'll just continue to wonder.  It's nice to have things out there to wonder about that you may never have an answer to.  Sometimes it's good not to know everything, as some people out there like to think they do.  Why would you want to know everything?  There would never be anything new for you.  You'd never be shocked to learn of something new because you already know it all.  What kind of life is that.  No little surprises.  I know, I'm rambling.  I'm having one of those days where my brain just goes off the deep end and doesn't seem to stop.  Anyone else have any of those days?  The days where you just seem to sit there and contimplate EVERYTHING and anything.  Your brain skips from one subject to another like you have a terrible case of ADD.  And then while you're thinking of all these things, you have some great wonderful idea... only when you're sane, later in the day, you either have no idea what the idea was or you sit there thinking, now why the hell would I have thought THAT was a good idea?  Well, that's enough thinking aloud of me today.  Everyone is fine or at least the same amount of fine that they were yesterday.  If anything changes on that end, I'll let ya'll know.  And I promise to try and stop the random rambling.  LOL

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just wanted to wish you luck on your job interview Friday. Glade the cat is better. ~Krista~

Anonymous said...

My clock started ticking about that age, too.  I finally became a mother at 28.  I think you probably have a strong maternal drive, that's what makes you want to rescue and nurture animals. :-)

Anonymous said...

My clock ticked without me knowing about it, >lol, and I had a baby when I was 19.......so she was already 2 when I was your age!  And 10 when I was only 29!  Then didn't have a second baby until I was 32!  13 year age difference......you never know......I feel more patient with the second one though.  I think it's because I was older.....and more experienced by then :-)

BTW, I love your journal.......anyone who rescues animals is SUPER in my book.  Hestia and I both have rescued Greyhounds......and I also rescued a bulldog......photos in my blog....

jerseygirl
http://journals.aol.com/cneinhorn/WonderGirl